A big family, a reading addiction, and the occasional celebrity scandal are the ingredients of life that create one woman's opinion on just about everything.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

January 10th

You know my mother always disliked depressing people. These were people who talked about their illnesses, real or imagined, all the time. Or people who complained about stuff...husbands, kids, jobs all the time. They all got lumped together as being depressing. The thing is if you met my mother you would never know of her secret distaste for "depressing people". My mother greeted and treated everyone with kindness, compassion and respect.

So it is with mixed emotions I write this post about January 10th. I usually post about my Mom on her birthday which is August 9th, but she usually gets a mention on January 10th as well. January 10th is the anniversary of her death. And now that I have mentioned this event here on my blog I officially belong to the category of depressing people. Trust me, she's sighing AND rolling her eyes.

While my Mom would cherish the idea that we remember her and still keenly feel her loss three years later, she would verbally kick our butts for still grieving. At every fall and stumbling block in life she was yapping at our heels to get up and get on with our lives.

"No one is going to send you an engraved invitation to your own life," she'd say.

But when you have such a person IN your life there is a big hole when they are gone. So Mom, I've been thinking about you a lot the past few days. I wanted to write about it so I could get on with my life. So maybe I'm a little bit depressing, but thankfully I know you love me anyway and will be yapping at my heels before I know it to get up and get on with it.

By the way...what did you think of the scrapbooks?



Blogger Gabrielle said...

Oh, that wasn't depressing, just a really nice tribute, a fine way of honoring her presence in your life.

As for scrapbooking, don't go there! It's a big black hole of paper and widgets and brads and stickers. That said, it seems every time I call my mom, her cousin (who lives about 3000kms away) is there and they've been up all night scrapbooking and they've just come home from a scrapbooking retreat (who knew??) I'm afraid if I started, I'd never stop--though I do love receiving the finished product. Oh, and I *do* use scrapbooking supplies to make a collage of each of my manuscripts. SO, um, yeah...

3:26 AM PST  
Blogger Lori said...


8:31 AM PST  
Blogger Jenster said...

How can you not grieve the loss of someone so spectacular? I agree with Gabrielle. That wasn't depressing at all. It was a wonderful testament.

12:39 PM PST  
Blogger Kristie (J) said...

I lost my mom 12 years ago and you never really stop mourning. And just because you talk about her with love and affection - the others are right! It's not depressing at all. You are honouring her.

4:47 PM PST  
Blogger The Book Girl, A.K.A. Jodi said...

My grandmother always said that it is better to be talked about than forgot about! By talking about your mom, it keeps her memory alive, which is a beautiful, not depressing, thing. :)

8:24 PM PST  
Blogger Rosie said...

Gabrielle, thanks...I have to say that no matter what you think you know about grief there are always surprises. My surprise is how keenly I still miss her.

Lori, thanks so much!

Jenster, I'm glad it wasn't a downer. Is it a bit much to talk about my Mom twice a year when she passed on 3 years ago? I dunno...I'm just going with my gut and writing about it.

Kristie, my sons' doctor told me he lost his Mom about 10 years ago. He says you never really get over it because it IS your Mom.

Jodi, I'm stealing Grandma's saying. What a great thought! Thanks.

8:29 PM PST  
Blogger scooper said...

Sometimes just being able to get your feelings out there the way you just did is the best therapy and tribute to a person.

I suck at scrapbooking. I was supposed to work on my daughter's Tae Kwon Do portfolio (scrapbook) over the holiday. Unfortunately, I haven't even looked at it. (Don't plan on it either).

6:27 AM PST  

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