It's Halloween?

Halloween. Not particularly my favorite holiday, and it arrives in my favorite season, so go figure. I think it all goes back to not liking to be scared and Halloweens of my childhood. I always wanted to stay home and handout candy instead of walk around in the dark with a bag and beg for treats. I was always terrified every time we rang a doorbell.

Then as a Mom I was always tortured between "buy a costume...make a costume" each year. We bought very few costumes so my boys had a wild conglomeration of get ups over the years. Most times they had the PC costume for school (dress up as your favorite character from a book...boys LOVE that!) and a scary costume for Trick or Treating. Although here in Southern California I haven't found Halloween to be quite as big a deal as it was when I grew up with school parties and fairs and community bazaars and such.

So with my grown up kids and a son with a birthday on October 28th we have LOTS of Halloween/Birthday parties over the years. This past Saturday was a case in point. Family, friends, kids, kids friends...I think there was about 30 people all told. I love having company and a gathering. I really, really do. However, this time I was in a flare period with my RA and the weekend ended up really kicking my ass. *sigh* These are the adjustments I hate to make and that remind me I haven't really accepted things as well as I like to believe.

Anyway, as a result of the fatigue I haven't posted in a while, but I have been reading. Today I downloaded a couple of stories from PBW's ebook challenge. If you haven't heard about it or checked it out, today is definitely the day to go take a look see. All the stories and authors with the links are posted on her site. I have to admire a working author who takes the time out to do this. Kudos to Lynn Viehl. I'm anxious to go back later today and get the link to HER story.

My posts might be a little sparse in the short term because sitting for lengthy period of time is pretty uncomfortable. Right now I'm off to B&N to check out today's releases. Have a Happy Halloween...hope you get all treats and NO tricks!!

KICK 'EM WHILE THEY'RE DOWN...

Imagine if you will my surprise and disgust when I went to PBW's site to see if she had posted an update on the events surrounding her son's arrest to read she will probably have to shut it down.

When something bad happens in our lives, being able to maintain some island of normalcy or finding some sanctuary of peace is so helpful to surviving whatever one might be going through. So to think her site(s) have to be shut down because she is receivng threats at a time when she and her family are so vulnerable is sad, and frankly a disappointing indictment of how people respond in a crisis.

I don't know why I was so shocked. It's not like I don't know the world we live in. But I do have to admit that I was stunned when I read about the threats, more so when she noted that she had gotten personal attacks (in posts) from colleagues within the industry in which she works! That is particularly slimey.

All those who have read about her son (she has newspaper links in her original post) and this horrible drama know that the victims' families must be suffering terribly. Since when does that preclude us from having compassion for the family of the accused? I took a pass on the Shark Bait 101. How do people sleep at night?

In many of the comments to PBW's original post people were offering their sympathy and assuring her that she shouldn't feel guilty about her son. Which, as a mother, most people know is almost impossible to do. A parent will always wonder if there was something else they could have or should have done to get a different outcome.

Having said that, reasonable people know that you can't hold a parent, or sibling, or grandparents, or aunts or uncles, or friends, or teachers, or pastors, accountable for the actions of another adult. Ultimately we are all responsible for our own actions.

Don't think I don't have compassion for someone's difficulties as a child. I know there are many situations people are innocently born into that leave them with almost impossible odds to overcome and succeed. At the same time, I strongly believe we have to teach our children from a very young age that they are accountable for their actions. Personal responsibility. You can' t blame Mommy and Daddy all your life if your life sucks when you are 25...or 35 or 50.

So, while PBW's loss is not the same, or as final as the loss of the victims' families. Her family is entitled to feel grief, loss, pain, and devastation from these murders, and her son's involvement. She and her family should be able and allowed to feel all these things without being villified or judged for it. Most significantly, she should be able to keep her blog site open and try to continue with her life the best way she can.

As for me, I will be keeping all the people touched by this horror in my thoughts and prayers during the difficult days ahead.

Sad News

Life at work has not been wonderful lately. In fact, I've been pretty close to quitting more than once the past month alone. Today is my mother's birthday. A mother I miss very much since her death 18 months ago.

So after a crap day at work, which was amplified by my blues about Mom, I was pretty fried by the time I was dragging myself home after picking up my son from school. I wanted nothing more than to check my email and veg before the whole evening routine began.

What do I find when I log on to my computer? AOL News that Dana Reeve, widow of actor Christopher Reeve, released a statement today that she has lung cancer. She decided to do the press release when she found out a tabloid was going to break the story. My thoughts and prayers go out to them. I feel so bad for her 13 year old son Will who has already been through so much.

After that I click on over to KarenS' blog and take a link ride to PBW and read about the tragedy in her life. This is an author that I frequently read (PBW) and her story about her son is nothing short of tragic.

Sure puts my sack of rocks in perspective.