A big family, a reading addiction, and the occasional celebrity scandal are the ingredients of life that create one woman's opinion on just about everything.

Saturday, October 04, 2008

The Center of the Universe

Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself. They came through you but not from you and though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
~Kahlil Gibran

My life is changing. Again. Life does that. These expected and anticipated changes. You logically know they are going to happen, yet somehow when they arrive it's sort of a surprise. Beanie moving out was not a surprise. It was planned. He was ready. We were ready. It was time. Yet now it seems so odd not to have him living under the same roof. That part was a surprise.

It felt wrong that overnight all those years of care and worry, the daily watering and care of my children, was just over. Done. Don't get me wrong. The move was a good thing. Beanie is doing great. Shmoo is doing great. It's just weird not to have to be on watch. Know what I mean?

In all honesty, I am a little melancholy. It's the passing of another stage of my life. For so many years the boys have been the center of the universe for GG and I.
Thank goodness we live in a time where the internet and cell phones make our loved ones so close and accessible. I'd probably be a real mess otherwise.

Anyway, lately GG and I find ourselves at home together. Without kids. This is like one of the premier best kept secrets about being an (almost) empty nester. Alone in your very own house without the kids! I have to say it's pretty freaking awesome. Hey, maybe that's why I'm not reading more??? I swear it's better than going away for the weekend because you get to be together AND sleep in your own bed.

Most fortunately we still enjoy each other's company. I'm so grateful we have so much to talk about every day. Laugh about. Complain about. We can be quiet together. We swim and walk together. It's pretty cool.


Just like that the planets and life have realigned. We now have a new center of the universe. Each other. So, I figure, what's not to like? C
hange is good. Right?

And Shmoo lives just down the hall and Beanie is only 50 miles away.

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Blogger nath said...

Hi Rosie :) Great pic of your sons!!! I like it!! and yes, it's great for you and GG :) You know, I'm sure that every parents love their children, but I'm also sure that they enjoy getting back their freedom a bit :P Glad that you and GG are doing well and are enjoying spending time together :)

5:58 AM PDT  
Blogger Rosie said...

Nath, I love that picture of the boys. It's about 3 years old, but a fave nonetheless.

8:28 AM PDT  
Blogger Lori said...

Isn't it wonderful to realize that you still really like each other after all the "kid" talk is over and done with?

Being the center of each other's universe, yet being two separate people with your own independent lives is so amazing. And to still have it after all the years together is such a gift. And also a product of a lot of hard work (even when it doesn't seem like work), which lots of folks don't realize.

And awesome that Beanie is still so close.

3:14 PM PDT  
Blogger Rosie said...

Lori, I'm going way off the mushy meter here, but I'm absolutely thrilled, delighted and awed by the friends and connections I've made online too. To meet and enjoy so many different people at this time in my life has been just incredible.

I knew when I posted this there would be people like you who would know exactly what I'm talking about.

3:44 PM PDT  
Blogger Jenster said...

Great photo and great post. We still have a little ways to go, but we try to keep "liking" each other now because some day it's just going to be the two of us.

Thanks for inspiration!

5:47 PM PDT  
Blogger lisabea said...

Aw. I heart you, lady. And those boys? You've done an excellent job. It shows.

5:50 PM PDT  
Blogger Rosie said...

Jen, all I can say is that the little birdies fly the coop before you know it. It seems like a blink and they are packing to move out. It's yet another phase of life and we are getting used to it, but just like learning to take care of them and sleep deprivation when we bring them home, it's another adjustment letting them go.

Lb, how are you doing with your little birdie gone from the nest? Missing her?

11:52 PM PDT  
Blogger Kristie (J) said...

They do leave the nest and while you are ready for them too, it still doesn't feel right somehow.
But then sometimes something wonderful happens - that happened to me just the other night. Brent - my oldest son, called me to say he was playing in a day long ball tournament with his fellow coworkers just a couple of miles away from where I live on Saturday and would I like to watch him play. He's 30 now (egads!!!!!!!) and hasn't played ball since he was 16 - which meant I haven't watched him play ball since he was 15 - half his life time ago. I was beyond thrilled that he asked. I went to watch him and he introduced me to so many of his coworkers - and proudly too.
So the point I'm trying to make is I know life changes when your children grow, but there are still occasions where they thrill you and offer those moments when you see they appreciate all the work you put in for them while you had them under your roof.
And it is a blessing that you and GG have time to 'rediscover' each other all over again. It's such a joy that you have both come through those tough parenting years together and whole.
And it is a Very Good pic of your boys. They are two fine looking young men who do their mama proud.

1:10 PM PDT  
Blogger Rosie said...

Awww... Kristie thanks. I do adore the little buggers. Brent inviting you to the baseball game does give me hope. That sounds like it was pretty special for you.

1:58 PM PDT  
Blogger CindyS said...

You're doing great! Sure, you'll have more bad moments when you listen for a noise that's familiar and it's no longer there but I can only imagine what it's like to re-discover your SO.

I think my parents were hit hard when I left because I was the first and even I knew it was a big deal. A separation of the family unit we had grown so accustomed too.

My parents had to find their way together again and it happened again when my dad retired. How do you go from having someone around only at night to all day long!

But they have certainly made me proud and I think they have made themselves proud. It's odd for Bob and I to know that my Dad now travels for work for months at at time. My poor Mom is very lonely without my Dad and we're learning from them that absence once again makes the heart grow fonder.

To many more adventures together for you and GG and many more with Schmoo and Beanie!


7:22 AM PDT  

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